Goblyn Mayem! How to make goblin interesting again

Goblyn Mayem! How to make goblin interesting again
A new way to think about our favorite evil creatures

Tags
#GobinWeek
#Goblinweek2020
dnd
dungeons_and_dragons
Monsters
osr
roleplaying_game
rpg
Tabletop RPG
By Barakiel il 2 Feb. 2020

Like 0 Comments 101 Views
.

So somebody (https://t.me/interesting0games check out his channel if you like) told me that past week was supposed to be the #GoblinWeek #Goblinweek2020.
So i had to write an article a day about goblins. As you can clearly see , i was not able to have such commitment to something, not even to my beloved, disgusting, favorite evil creatures.

So i will give you my personal take on Goblinhood anyway, so you too can insert goblin in your setting, making sure that anyone can fear and cover in front of their majesty.

So what are Goblins? Goblins are nasty little creatures that feed on fantasy settings like shameless parasites. Any world have goblins in some way or another: in some settings they are called in some other exotic way, have some strange skin color or be malevolent in different way, but deep down we know that in every dirty and dark place there is a chance to meet a creature that resemble a goblin: small, dirty, mostly stupid and prone to unnecessary display of violence.

Why?
Because Goblins, like cockroaches, can hide and spawn everywhere, and are the kind of pests that you cannot eradicate without burning everything in a radius of ten miles to their cove to ashes.

But often, like cockroaches, they are ignored, or used like low level cannon fodder for the joy and bewilderment of young adventurers to feast upon.

How can we make so that they become the fearless masters of evil things that they are born to be?

We'll give them the tools not only to defend themselves, but also to be a real menace to the world.
We'll start with one Goblin.
He only have 1 hp, the kind of challenge that even the most coward farmer with an hoe can fight and win.
One goblin is smart like a small animal, he'll have only instinct by his side.
What is his instinct? To cover in fear and find a place to hide. Better if warm, wet and dark.
How can a race of creatures with a life expectancy of 3 to 5 year and the physical prowess of a teenager to continue existing despite the odds?
Because a single Goblin, left undisturbed, can expel with his sweat and feces hundreds small eggs. If those eggs find a wet and warm place they will grow to the size of a fist during the first hour and will hatch a small goblin in 1d4 days. When the first goblin hatch, he will immediately search for unhatched eggs and devour them. The Egg Feast can endure for days, until only 1d10 new goblin remains, big as a human child.

Now, what happen if we have more goblin? Some said that goblins are more brave in big numbers. That's not it. The fact is that goblins share some kind of mind bond that allow them to synchronize even if they don't even know what that word means. Every single goblin is like a single neuron of a brain: more goblins equals to more intelligent and wise goblins.

How can we describe such evolution?

First: we’ll treat the a Goblin ensemble as a single monster, with hp equals to the number of Goblin unit in the tribe. The tribe will change is way of life depending on how many Goblin will live inside, becoming smarter and more evolved while his numbers grows.

- 1 Goblin have the intelligence of a little animal

- 10 Goblins will be able to use simple tools, like stick and stones.

- 30 Goblins can manage to craft simple weapons like spears, daggers and nets and use some primitive poison created from their own sick blood
and plants.
Their life expectancy rise to 5 years.

- 50 Goblins will be able to start building some huts with wood or stone, and craft some martial weapons like swords and shields. The goblins will
always wear some kind of primitive armor at this point. They will protect their buildings by fortifications and simple traps like holes covered by
planks and dirt, poisoned arrow traps and spear traps.
Their life expectancy rise to 10 years.

- 100 Goblins will stop to think like animals and starts to form a simple form of tribe civilization.
If not erased from existence by some kind of external force, this tribe can rise above other smaller group of goblins, starting to expand their
numbers by conquering other tribes or forcing other smaller group of goblins to join their numbers. Member of this kind of tribe can learn the
common tongue. A goblin tribe of this kind will build a sturdy camp, usually inside some large cave system. The goblins of a tribe will be able to
craft sturdier armors and weapons. The Goblins will become smarter in the ways of war, starting to organize ambushes and to raid small and
undefended settlements nearby.
Their life expectancy rise to 15 years.

- 200 Goblins will start to build some kind of stone fort inside their cave system. The goblins now will start to understand the basic of strategy,
using guerrilla tactics to wear any opponents too big to be defeated in upfront combat, but usually will try to remain undetected. They will start to
understand how their biology work, and do anything to preserve their numbers and use items to defend themselves.
Their life expectancy rise to 30 years.

- 300 Goblins will be able to build an entire city underground, with solid walls and great fortifications able to resist even an army. At this point they
will start a crusade against every other creature that inhabits their cave system. If the cave system is too small, they will start some excavating
project to expand it. They’ll be able to craft siege equipment and use advanced war strategy to survive any attack from the outside world.
Their life expectancy rise to 50 years.
- 500 Goblins will wait until all their cave system is expanded and conquered to at least the size of a big city and will stop fighting. The fortifications
will become matter of legend, and will be very difficult to assault the city without some very good plan. Their craft will be perfected, allowing them
to wear top notch equipment worthy of war.
At this point exceeding goblins, in group of 50, will be sent to nearby caves to start the cycle anew and function as spies to prevent enemy
movements.
Their life expectancy rise to 60 year.

If 5 or more cities like this successfully rise, this now wise and intelligent people will unite under a single banner to conquer the outside world. The cities will become fortresses, starting to furiously hatch more goblin to fill the ranks in case of loss.

A Goblin Horde is a unique and horrible show to witness. An army of cunning strategist and bloodthirsty warriors whose unique goal is to kill, plunder and destroy, not necessarily in that order.

If you have no idea of how strong a goblin tribe should be in combat you can be a boring human being and use the following table:

Units/ HP | AC | To Hit | Damage/Round |Special
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
1 | 10 | +1 | 1 - 3 | -
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
10 | 11 | +2 | 2 - 8 | Can attack from crossbow distance
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
30 | 13 | +3 | 20 -25 | Use items and poisons
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
50 | 15 | +4 | 21- 36 | +2 AC inside buildings - Traps
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
100 | 16 | +5 | 40 - 47 | +4 To Hit and Damage inside Building
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
200 | 18 | +7 | 63 - 68 | Regeneration 100/day
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
300 | 20 | +9 | 99 -104 | All Bonus are Doubled
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
500 | 22 | +11 | 177 -194 | All bonus are Tripled

What if a large number of Goblins are killed?
If the remaining goblin are less than before and under one of the steps listed above they will revert to that level of social intelligence, regaining only if they are able to replenish their number to the former one.

But is this enough to make Goblins really scary and different?
It’s never enough, but we can make it better:

The first creature with class levels that the Goblins kill will mark a significant change in the way they live.
After defeating a worthy enemy the Goblins can learn from the battle and from the way their adversary fought. Such learning can be imprinted to future generations even before they are even born, because the Goblin eggs will retain all the intelligence of the tribe:

1) If the first kill is of a Fighting class, the goblins will naturally spawn a large number of Hobgoblins. Those hobgoblins will start to lead the tribe in a savage and bloodthirsty way. An Hobgoblin tribe is easily recognizable because they will start to develop a Warrior culture, where the strongest is celebrated as a Hero. Members of a Hobgoblin tribe will always wear body parts of their enemy to show how many they defeated in battle (Hands, fingers, skulls, bones or some other part of your choice). They will use battle banner made of their enemy skins and painted with their blood. They’ll feast on every poor soul that will have the misfortune to fall under their weapon, burn every village or city they defeat, leave no one alive.

2) If the first kill is of an Arcane casting class, the goblins will naturally spawn a large number of Tinkerers. Goblin Tinkerers will try to evolve their tribe to the next stage of evolution. A Tinkerer tribe will start experimenting with magic, mutating non magical members of the tribe in weird and unexpected way. The home of this kind of tribe can be a truly horrific sight: deformed creatures full of eyes, limbs, claws or wings that shamble through the caverns an building, feeding on magic sources like natural crystals, magic beasts, magical items or magical user. Every day more and more mutated goblin will be discarded outside their tribe’s home and start to roam the land in search of things to feed on. Attacking a Tinkerer tribe is not only a challenge because of the magic used by the Goblins, but also because it’s necessary to withstand the impact of disgust caused by the sight of these abominations. They will only became hostile to outside sources if threatened by something that could cause their experiment to stop.

3) If the first kill is of a Divine casting class, the goblins will naturally spawn a large number of Warlocks. Goblin Warlocks will be attuned to some Dark and Twisted forgotten God, and will shape their tribe to a cult to serve this weird entity.
They will try to convert or at least corrupt other sentient life forms to the service of their Dark Master, and will try to sacrifice alive the ones that try to resist. They will be able to wield Divine Magic and Eldritch Invocations alike with ease and will have as final goal to summon a physical form of their outside Patron to cleanse the world from the unbelievers. Their banners will resemble a drawing of a mad painter more than something real. They can be reasoned with, but beware, because they will always try to use every allied force as a pawn to further their dark schemes.

4) If the first kill is of a Stealth class, the goblins will naturally spawn a large number of Bugbears. Bugbears are terrorist and anarchist who believe that social order and social constructs are to be abolished to achieve true Goblinhood: a world where everyone can free to do whatever the hell it want to. For them the only way to achieve this goal is by literally blow up all places of “oppression”. No target is safe from a Bugbear Tribe: castles, universities, fortresses, temples, guilds, every place where an organized force try to impose some way of acting or thinking will be a target for some “deplatforming”, usually in the form of a big scary bomb placed inside the basement of a building. This kind of tribe will always leave some kind of signature for their work: a pamphlet, a symbol, a writing on a still standing wall, something that illustrate their way of thinking, always written in goblin tongue.

If , again, you are the kind of boring human as above, you can give mechanical bonuses to the goblin tribe based on their evolution type:

1
An Hobgoblin tribe will be versed in the Arts of War. Give them combat bonuses like
- Multiattack
- Advantage while attacking and advantage to the enemy while being attacked
- Morale Boost after killing
- Heal HP after devouring cadavers

2
A Tinkerer tribe will be able to launch arcane spells like a mage of:
- 10 Goblins = 3rd level
- 30 Goblins = 5th level
- 50 Goblins = 7th level
- 100 Goblins = 9th level
- 200 Goblins = 11th level
- 300 Goblins = 13th level
- 500 Goblins = 15th level
- More than 500 together = 17th level
Give some kind of terror effect on sight.

3
A Warlock tribe will be able to launch divine spells or eldritch invocations like a cleric or warlock of:
- 10 Goblins = 3rd level
- 30 Goblins = 5th level
- 50 Goblins = 7th level
- 100 Goblins = 9th level
- 200 Goblins = 11th level
- 300 Goblins = 13th level
- 500 Goblins = 15th level
- More than 500 together = 17th level

4
A Bugbear tribe will be able to
- Craft better Traps
- Build explosives
- Be stealth
- Craft items like an artificer of :
- 10 Goblins = 3rd level
- 30 Goblins = 5th level
- 50 Goblins = 7th level
- 100 Goblins = 9th level
- 200 Goblins = 11th level
- 300 Goblins = 13th level
- 500 Goblins = 15th level
- More than 500 together = 17th level

Edited by Barakiel - 19/2/2020, 15:55

Share

.

1 user(s) online

Last comments

Tags

Statistics

Barakiel

Blog Roll

Goblyn Mayem! How to make goblin interesting again
A new way to think about our favorite evil creatures

1 user(s) online

Last comments

Tags

Statistics

Barakiel

Blog Roll

Goblyn Mayem! How to make goblin interesting againA new way to think about our favorite evil creatures

Goblyn Mayem! How to make goblin interesting again
A new way to think about our favorite evil creatures